
Monday, May 12, 2008
The Wife Keeps Selling Me Out
An interesting letter in an advice column on CNNMoney.com today. A reader writes to an advice guru distraught over his wife blabbing to her money grubbing relatives about her family's personal finances. Sounds like there might be some other issues involved:
Question: I love my wife, but her inability to keep her mouth shut about money has become a real problem. She’s got a couple of relatives whose hands come out whenever they hear that I’ve gotten a raise or that we’ve treated ourselves, for example, to a big screen TV. I handle our finances, and I’m beginning to think I shouldn’t be telling Heather as much about them as I do. Under the circumstances, would this be wrong?
The typical 'communication is the key to any good relationship' crap is rolled out as an answer. The all-knowing advice givers explain that speaking honestly and being upfront is the best possible solution.
I'm not sure if this is the best technique, maybe using immaturity and rash thinking would be a better way to deal with Heather? How about divulging embarrassing personal secrets from the bedroom or unnecessary menstrual cycle details?
There's really nothing more uncomfortable than getting hit up for a few bucks by everyone's least favorite alcoholic, Uncle Al. And with all those July 4th, Memorial Day, and Softball Sunday family BBQs coming up, this is probably one of the most inopportune times to be trying to dodge the 'lend-me' bullet.
This man's situation builds a strong case for the 'separate family' strategy. You see, the trick here is to have two separate families going on at the exact same time. I'm not really sure the logistics of it, but it has something to do with a lot of golf trips and business travel. And fake names are probably a must as well. But either way if you can pull all of that off, I'm sure keeping financial matters a secret is real easy.
Got any other tips for this poor guy with the yappy wife? Let us know in the comments section.
CNNMoney: My Wife Can't Keep a Secret About Money, May 12, 2008
CATEGORIES:








Comments
Make sure the second family is
Make sure the second family is somewhere pleasant to visit, say the Bahamas or the Cayman Islands (I hear they have nice bank privacy laws).
If he is going to expend the energy maintaining two families, then the second one should be some place extra special. Just saying.
Why does it feel like that letter was
Why does it feel like that letter was written by Tony Soprano?
Sad that you can't trust the wife to
Sad that you can't trust the wife to keep her mouth shut. I don't have that problem with the wife. Human nature is to want to share good news with your spouse. However, I did notice that her spending problems would get worse after I would tell her conversationally about a market gain. So, as much as I'd rather talk about when I do well, now I only tell her about my losses.
If you're thinking two separate families is the answer then you've got too much money. You've also got a good premise for a sitcom.
i never tell anyone about my
i never tell anyone about my millions.
if ya tell em, ya either won't have your friends or your money for long.
notice i use anonymous here.
My husband has many good traits, strong
My husband has many good traits, strong points, and thing I love about him.
He also never met a dollar he couldn't spend.
20 years of marriage later - I control the money. Completely. He doesn't even open his paycheck envelop on payday. He has an atm card that I tell him how much is available, and a few bucks in his pocket at a time.
I even have to go with him to buy gas several times a week - in case there's a book, camping, car store between him and the gas station.
Considering that it's his biggest (and only serious) flaw - I live with it.
The wife who blabs is bragging. Assuming that she in incapable of not bragging - give her something different to brag about or hide the finances from her.